Episode 54: Social media: A hidden street corner dealing drugs to kids!

Did you know your kid can easily access drugs and dealers on social media such as Instagram or Snapchat? Listen in to hear one mom's tragic story! 

Dr. Laura Bergman's story: https://abc7chicago.com/dr-laura-berman-son-fentanyl-overdose-buy-drugs-social-media/10324555/

Interview with drug dealers that use Snapchat: https://boingboing.net/2020/02/06/its-easy-to-buy-drugs-on-sna.html

Childhood 2.0 movie: https://www.childhood2movie.com/

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 FULL TRANSCRIPTION:

Speaker 1 (00:00):

Once upon a time, drugs were dealt in a sort of obvious way by hanging out on street corners or going to certain places to pick up drugs today, drugs are dealt through two very popular social media platforms and your kiddo is likely on one of these. So today we're going to talk about one story of a mom who thought she was doing everything right and low and behold, her child got ahold of something and did not survive. And she is sharing her story out on social media to help other parents realize this very, very real danger and to help other parents save their kids. So please listen today and please have a conversation with your kiddo when you're done. Please check out the links. I'm going to drop in the show notes for you to learn more about her story. And some of the other resources that I have found that are very, very disturbing, but are things that we absolutely need to know about today. Okay. Stay tuned.

Speaker 2 (01:01):

Welcome to your source for tips, tools, and support to help you be that mom that is tuned in and proactive for yourself, your family, and for the wild ride of raising kids in this digital age, inspired by a mother's love with a relatable real life. Proud to be that mom flair. This is the bead that mom movement with your host, Dolly Denson, he friends. Did you,

Speaker 1 (01:26):

You here, there is an app that will transform the safety of your kids. Smartphone and technology use. It is my favorite way to sleep easy at night and have peace of mind because it is monitoring my kids' activity online without me being in their business. It is the bark app and yes, bark like a dog bark bark bark. It tells you when there's something that you need to be concerned about starting at a small fee each month, you can protect your whole family across all devices. Get connected with bark today. Use code, be that mom for 20% off your subscription for life and get a seven day free trial to check it out. So before we get rolling on this very important topic, I just want to tell you that I put together a couple of tip sheets that you can download that, you know, completely free.

Speaker 1 (02:11):

You just put in your email and then it will send you, or the next screen will be a place where you can download it. But I have a tip sheet for using bark and then other digital resources I recommend. And then the second one is a, just a general digital resource guide if I'm not necessarily specific for bark, but if you are looking to, you know, find more resources in things that are recommended, I have some discount codes in there too. Some of the links that I share are affiliate links, which means I get compensated for sharing those links at no extra cost to you, just as a way to help fund this podcast. So any support that you provide me is greatly appreciated. So I can bring more of this to you. And the most important thing that I want to do is to get these things in the hands of you and your children so that we can protect them because the digital world is absolutely a threat to their safety and their future.

Speaker 1 (03:06):

So that's why I'm here to help us all be that mom, but be strong, be proactive, join hands together to get this done. And the tools that I share are absolutely things I have used. I have checked out thoroughly and I do not share anything that I don't wholeheartedly believe can help you. Okay. So please check those things out, download those today. I'm hoping that they're helpful for you. Okay. So today I want to talk about this story that I've heard for a couple of weeks. This actually occurred at the beginning of February, I believe, but I keep having it pop up again in my newsfeed. And I paid a little bit more attention to it this last time and read more about what exactly happened and felt compelled to just set aside the thing that I was going to talk about today and bring this to your attention, because it's something that even with the best of intentions with bark and everything else that we do this slipped through this mom's hands and very much could slip through your hands too.

Speaker 1 (04:05):

Okay. So what I'm talking about is a mom by the name of Dr. Laura Berman. I believe she is on several talk shows in different things, helps with relationships, but she has a son. His name was CME and he was 16 years old. And beginning of February, I'm not sure the exact date. It was a normal day for them. He was looking at colleges and internships and he had come and had his dad make him a cheeseburger. And then he went back up to his room. It may maybe been an hour since they had seen him and he wanted her to come to his room. So he could talk about some stuff that he was doing for upcoming internships for this summer. Well, when she arrived in his room, she found him on the floor and he wasn't breathing. She called emergency services. They came, tried for 30 minutes to bring him back and they could not.

Speaker 1 (04:58):

She says that she thought she was doing everything right. She talked to her kids about all of the things, but she thought that what she needed to be worrying about with her child being on social media was nude pictures and things such as that, she never once thought that her son would experiment with drugs and that, that would kill him. But let me tell you how scary this is, because when you think about it, you're probably thinking my kid would never do that. Okay. Personally, in my own experience, what brought me to doing this podcast was not this, but could have gotten to this very quickly. I saw this stuff happening among peers of my son. And fortunately we caught onto it. But Dr. Laura, she says that about a year prior, her son was using marijuana and where she lived, it was legal. So they talked about it, but he had written out like this paper.

Speaker 1 (05:52):

She said that he researched everything. So he had written out this paper to argue his point of why using marijuana was okay, so they did not approve of it, but it was something that they were dealing with. Well, this day came and she contacted his friends and through his friends, she found out that he had been in touch with someone on Snapchat to get drugs. But when we're talking drugs, we're not talking heroin cocaine, which are something that you can't get, but we're talking a pill of what his friend thinks was Percocet. He thinks that's what he was trying to get from this drug dealer. And the problem is they're seeing this more and more. And CME story is just one story of many, many stories. Dr. Laura said that when she put her story out on her social media, she has been bombarded by stories from other parents going through the same thing, where they lost their child or almost lost their child.

Speaker 1 (06:52):

So this is very, very prevalent. But what she has found after talking to other parents is that they say that she's, she hears it. I don't have a way to verify this directly, but she, what she has heard is that there's a place that will make drugs. That look very similar to the drugs that you know, were prescribed like Percocet. I don't know that it's on the market anymore, but hydrocodone and those types of things they'll make the pill look like that. But it's laced with fentanyl. And it only has a tiny amount of fentanyl in there, but it's not precisely measured. So she said, basically what happened to her son was that it wasn't an overdose. It was actually poisoning that they believe there at the time that she did the last interview that I heard, they were still waiting on toxicology reports, but they believed that he had too much fentanyl in there.

Speaker 1 (07:42):

And if you're not familiar with what fentanyl is, how I'm familiar with it is anesthesia for surgery. So I've seen it in the hospital setting in the surgery setting, but not just out in the regular world. So they believed that her son took one pill of what he thought was Percocet. And it was laced with fentanyl. They say that the drug dealers will put it into the pills because it is highly, highly addictive. And so they're wanting them to get addicted and want more drugs and buy more drugs from them. So the problem with that is they don't measure it precisely. And so there's more and more stories about kids getting a hold of this and dying from it while they are experimenting with it. They think it's, you know, they're just experimenting with it. And of course, teenagers think they're mortal and don't understand that they can't die.

Speaker 1 (08:30):

And so, you know, they just try it. The really scary part of this is that she said that she had monitored them very closely up to the age of 14, but after 14, she felt like they were old enough to handle things. So she didn't know his passwords or how to get into his phone. And so at the time she did this interview, it had only been a couple of days or maybe a week since he had passed away, but could not get into his phone. Apple would not give her the information to get into his phone until they had a death certificate. She couldn't get a death certificate because of something like toxicology report or something like there's all these snowball things that kept her from getting into her son's iPhone. Okay. So I don't mean to laugh there, but I, that was more of a sigh.

Speaker 1 (09:19):

It's just mind boggling to me that this could go on and to go on in these apps, like Snapchat is largely an 18 and under crowd. And so they're preying on our kids. Through these apps. Snapchat is really hard to track as well as Instagram. And now Instagram has disappearing messages too. So it's really hard to track down the person. And when Dr. Laura talked to the police, when they came to her house, the friend of her son sent a screenshot of like the menu that this person sent her son with the different drugs and it had his username on it. And the cops basically said, you know, we can turn that in and investigate, but basically Snapchat may shut down that account. They'll just open it up under another name and they're not using their real name. And so it's pretty much impossible to track and to shut these people down.

Speaker 1 (10:11):

So, as I was looking at things to prepare for this recording to bring to you, I looked up stats and I just looked up drug use in teens and children. And these were from 2018. They said 18% would buy drugs online. And these were just very quick stats that I reviewed, but they said 30% of cocaine users said they can get cocaine through Snapchat in less than 30 minutes once they pay for it. So then I found a video and I'm going to put this in the show notes, but I found a video of a girl that I believe this was in like the UK or something someplace like that, not in the U S but she basically kind of investigated, like making an account on Instagram and Snapchat. She put a picture on there that was like, she was a young kid. And then she went searching, like searching for different names of drugs and very quickly, within a matter of minutes or less found accounts that had pictures of different drugs for sale, you basically message them. And then they ask where you are and then they'll deliver it to you. She did the same thing on Snapchat and within seconds, she had multiple people contacting her, asking what her address was, so they could get the money from her and deliver it like very, very quickly and very persistently. So then

Speaker 3 (11:33):

She went and met with

Speaker 1 (11:35):

These people. Like she made a deal with someone and went and met with them and asked them while they were disguised and undercover asked to talk to them about what they do. And these were basically teenagers saying that it's just a way for them to make money. And they said that the way they justify it is that they don't pursue these kids. The kids come to them. They said that they do to kind of give themselves a good name. Like they measure some of the drugs by weight. They'll pack a little bit of extra in. So the kid will know that they got a really good deal with them. And then they'll refer their friends. And then they said, there's no pursuing them. They just put the stuff out. They have people following their account. They put it out. They say what they want. They make the deal, they get the delivery.

Speaker 1 (12:17):

So this is very, very frightening because so many of us have given our kids Snapchat or Instagram thinking, you know, Instagram, I thought was a good place to take pictures. You know, post pictures, connect with your friends, Snapchat, same thing. But now we know differently. And we know that there are people praying on there. And honestly, I didn't know how easy it was until I started listening to Dr. Laura story about Sammy. And then I found this video of this girl, you know, checking out some of the drug dealers in, I believe the UK. So I want to give you a couple of things, suggestions that I recommend that you do. And just know that one thing that Dr. Laura recommends is that you always have the, in the code for their phone, the login for all of their apps, all of their things that they get into, but especially Snapchat and Instagram.

Speaker 1 (13:10):

So tips that I have for you is number one, have a conversation with your kid today. And I know I've had conversations with them, but I was never aware of this danger of the fentanyl. I had heard about it a couple of months ago, when, you know, we were trying to figure out all our things with our son, but I didn't realize how prevalent it was. So have a conversation with your kid, let them know that the pills that they may be getting are likely not what they think they are. And there's no way to know what they are. So do not experiment. I know, like with marijuana, a lot of times it's just experimentation, but that leads to other things. When they start get that like psychoactive response of, you know, the way it makes them feel, then they want to try other things.

Speaker 1 (13:55):

And it's a snowball effect that leads to other things. So a lot of times I know a lot of people were argue against me on this, but a lot of times marijuana is an entry drug just because of the psychoactive effects that it has. And then that leads to experimenting with other things. Okay. So even if you're in a place where it is legal, I still caution you on considering this. And then at the very least have a conversation with your kid and let them know, do not try anything. You cannot trust it. And a lot of these drug dealers are bringing in fentanyl to help you get addicted and to buy more stuff for them. And there's just always the chance that that fentanyl that's in there is too much because a tiny, tiny amount will be too much and will kill you, especially if the child is younger and smaller in size.

Speaker 1 (14:41):

Okay. So number one is have a conversation with your kiddo right away when you can, you know, try to check out the resources I share. And if you feel like any of them are appropriate for them to listen to, please have them listen to that too. Okay. A second thing, like I've said over and over and over and over again, if you've listened to any more of my episodes is number one. If they don't have a smartphone, don't give them one, at least not too soon. Start with a pinwheel phone or the gab phone, the advantage of the pinwheel phone over the gab phone that I think in this instance is a very, very important difference is the fact that you can put bark on that phone on a pinwheel phone. So it'll monitor the text messages too. Okay. And then if they do have a smartphone get bark on that phone, okay.

Speaker 1 (15:24):

Use the layered approach that I discuss in episode 48 and my digital download thing that I'm going to put in the show notes that I mentioned at the beginning is also going to have that layered approach in there with all the links and resources for you to get that set up. Okay. That will help you to monitor conversations. Okay. As far as like Snapchat, it's very difficult to monitor it because of the nature of Snapchat. Okay. Whether I keep saying, okay, don't I, whether you have an Android or an Apple, Snapchat is one thing that's very hard to monitor, but think about it like this. If you have bark on that phone, if they text their friend and say, Hey, I [inaudible], it's going to catch that. Okay, it's going to catch their activities in it that may give you, you know, some form of an alert as to what they might be doing.

Speaker 1 (16:12):

Some gut intuition that you need to check more. Okay. And then the third thing is watch besides the stuff I put in the show notes, which I'll put this in there too, but watch the movie childhood 2.0, in addition to the other resources that I give you. Okay. And I will put that in the show notes too, but watch that because it is about, it was made by bark. It's a documentary by bark, but it is about one of their workers going undercover as a kid. And it's mainly related to grooming, but it talks about a lot of things related to social media and all of the influences. Another good movie to watch is social dilemma on Netflix. All of those will give you a really good idea on the influences of all those things. Okay. But the main thing that I wanted to talk about was Sammy story in honor of Sammy in honor, his mother who's been so brave in sharing her story.

Speaker 1 (17:02):

She should shared it. I think the day that he died or the very next day. And that's when I first saw it, it was shared from a mutual brand that also is in the space of helping parents keep their kids safe. And that's how I saw it. That's how I started following her. But she's been so courageous, you know, through tears, through telling her story. And I just want to thank her so much and honor her and pass this along to as many parents as I can because our children, men are absolute treasure. They're our absolute future. And this trying not to cry this digital world can be such an amazing thing, but it can be such a scary thing. So let's band together, join arms, join hands, and be that mom that's proactive for our kid. But I just want to reiterate that bark would not have caught this for Dr.

Speaker 1 (17:52):

Laura because he used Snapchat. And because of the way that he messaged and you know, nothing's going to be foolproof. The biggest thing you can do is stay in direct communication with your kid and have all of these different safeguards in place so that, you know, when they're on their phones, you know what things they're looking at. And if you have the ability to not even introduce Snapchat, don't introduce it, don't get it or remove it. They don't have to have it. I had for my daughters, they both had Snapchat, but they're both older now. So I think that it was less dangerous than, than it is now. More. There weren't as many predators on there. And then all of them had Instagram, but for my youngest, no Instagram, no Snapchat. It's just the way it is. So if you, you know, make your decision on what you want to do with that.

Speaker 1 (18:35):

But personally, I think parents need to all band together and we need to push back on these social media platforms, if they can sensor by us just saying certain words or posting a certain article or video that, you know, they're self-proclaimed fact checkers are going to sensor, then they could do something about this. So that tells me that for whatever reason, it's just not their top priority. Maybe it's because it, you know, they're there to get money from us and from ads and things like that. So they just don't consider it a priority, their official statements from the different things that I watched said that they do shut down accounts and all of that, but it's hard to keep track of all of them. And I've always said that, you know, these predators are just very savvy about what they do and how they do it.

Speaker 1 (19:26):

But at the same time, going through the year 2020 and the election in the U S and all the things that have happened in the last couple of months, I'm not convinced that they couldn't do something about this if they really wanted to, but maybe what needs to happen is we just get our kids off of these devices or off of these apps, if they have smartphones. And we pushed back at the moms and we let them know who is boss in this world. And that is the mothers of this world. We are the boss and are the bosses. And we are the ones that are the protectors of our children. And we're not going to stand for this. We have to do that for the sake of our kids and their future in their beautiful lives that are ahead of them. Poor little Sammy's was cut short, and he had so many plans. No parent needs to go through that. And her Sammy was cut short on all the things that he wanted to do in life. So in honor of Sammy, please talk to your kids today. And let's put an into to this drug dealing that's going on on Snapchat and Instagram, and is so easily in the hands of our kids. Okay. Thank you so much for listening and I will chat with you next time.

Speaker 2 (20:35):

Thanks for tuning in being that mom isn't easy, but together we can be that mom's strong. Don't forget to leave a review, connect on social and join. Dolly's free community till next time. He, if you are a mom that has

Speaker 1 (20:50):

A lot on your plate, like I do, and you struggle with anxiety or sleep, or even chronic pain issues, please check out my soul cbd.com. They are the one and only CBD source that I trust. And you can use my code, be that mom for 15% off of your purchase.